What's the best advice you can give in just 4 words? — R Voice

What's the best advice you can give in just 4 words?

Kakoli Majumder
Kakoli Majumder Member, Administrator, Moderator Posts: 249 admin

Saw this thread on Twitter and thought it would be a great way to get some motivation on a Monday morning!

As the week starts, you immerse yourself in work with a vengeance. Your mind gradually starts filling up with goals, deadlines, targets, to-do lists, and before you know, all those promises of practicing self-care and work-life balance that you made to yourself over the weekend are thrown out the window. And then begins the endless cycle of guilt about missing exercise, not drinking enough water, not being able to find the right balance, and so on until it leads to - "I'm not good enough." So my advice to myself and to everyone else is: Be kind to yourself.

What's the best advice you'd like to share today? Remember, you have 4 words only! 😄

@Gustavo Goes @Dorotheah Oniri @Mdumiseni Mazula @Lafi Munira @Hollie McDonnell @Parul Nigam @Fatemeh Hosseini @Debora Gusmao Would love to hear your advice!


  • Shruti Turner
    Shruti Turner Member Posts: 391 ✭✭✭✭

    Just [insert word] do it!

    I am so often held back by my own fears and worries about looking silly or not being good enough of whatever "what if?!". That in itself is self-sabotage. Whether it's that email you want to send to reach out to someone new, or a post you want to share on R Voice or the fellowship/grant you want to go for...or even something in your personal life...trying that new hobby, making a new friend, trying a new recipe. Don't let your inner fears/insecurities hold you back! :)

  • Kakoli Majumder
    Kakoli Majumder Member, Administrator, Moderator Posts: 249 admin

    @Shruti Turner It's the same with me! Feels so good to know I'm not the only one! I don't know what to do with this perpetual fear of not being perfect! I kid you not, even this morning while creating this post, I was tempted to delete it thinking 'is it even worth posting?' Even when picking up the phone to call a friend, I keep thinking if it's the right time. I'm trying really hard to come out of this. I've decided to err on the side of doing what I set out to, even at the cost of looking silly.😅

  • Andrea Hayward
    Andrea Hayward Member, Administrator, Moderator Posts: 696 admin

    Great post @Kakoli Majumder! Mine echoes much of what @Shruti Turner said about not letting your fears, insecurities, imposter feelings, and in my case, intense fear of failure hold you back. More than advice, it's a question I ask myself whenever one of these nagging thoughts or worries are trying to stop me from doing something or trying to tell me I won't succeed. To these thoughts I say, "What if it works?" 😉

    I also thought of another one "Yes, you're worth it" but this had me sounding like a shampoo commercial so I'd rather not get into it lol 🤣

  • Hollie McDonnell
    Hollie McDonnell Member Posts: 8

    "Ask, just in case"

    As someone who is uncertain with research at times, and when imposter syndrome really kicks in, I find that it eases my anxiety if I can ask someone (a lecturer, my supervisors, etc.) just to double-check if I'm doing something right if I'm wondering about something. It seems so simple but has been so effective in my first year on this academic journey! :)

  • Kakoli Majumder
    Kakoli Majumder Member, Administrator, Moderator Posts: 249 admin

    @Hollie McDonnell Thank you for sharing this wonderful piece of advice! So often, we hesitate to ask - for help, advice, support, views. Sometimes, just asking makes things fall into place. And even if you don't get the help you asked for, you have nothing to lose. In fact, sometimes just having a sympathetic listener can make you feel better. So yes, go ahead and ask!

  • Shruti Turner
    Shruti Turner Member Posts: 391 ✭✭✭✭

    Sorry for the delayed response, @Kakoli Majumder. I totally missed the notification.

    I definitely don't think we are alone in this, as proven by @Andrea Hayward 's comment too. I'm so glad that you did post this thread as it's great to feel the community sense and the themes come out. I really struggle with overthinking choices both professionally and personally, and am trying to take my own advice and follow your lead erring on the side of doing what we intended in the first place!