@Shruti Turner I'm definitely with you on feeling stressed when I feel out of control. Similar to what you said, this usually happens when I'm trying to fit too many things into a single day. Then my mind looks something like this "OMG I have to get this work done, and then there's also that other task I have on my list, and I need to finish work on time so that I still have time to exercise and also clean after and tend to Stitches (may cat)" -- this can really go on! One thing that's helped me in particular is the realization that the work will still be waiting for me tomorrow and that I'll be able to get more work done if my mind is at peace and I'm feeling fine. It took a lot of work but this realization is really how I managed to get my weekends back and strictly stop myself from even looking at my laptop over the weekend. 😅
@Isurika Sevwandi glad I could make a day and put a smile on your face! 😊 Also, I LOVE "Long distance buddy" - it has such a warm ring to it. I've always wanted to have a pen pal and this feels like I'm getting close to that wish. Yay!
@Dahlia T thank you so much for being so honest and candid with us, and for pointing out something I'm sure everyone on this thread will agree to - We're all a WORK IN PROGRESS! And the best part about this is that it's perfectly okay ☺️
I can relate so well to "curling up under a blanket" and waiting there until the stressful feelings have passed. It's really so comforting and sometimes I wish this Mumbai weather would co-operate enough for me to do this more often. Until then, my trusty AC will have to do the trick lol 😃
Thank you @Andrea Hayward ! self-knowledge and self-responsibility are very important to help us looking into things with clarity and perspective.
I think this issue of stress needs to be revisited once again because is increasingly becoming a global issue.
When it comes to destressing or relieving stress, we should always pay attention to how our body works to be able to identify at what point good stress advances to bad stress (stress awareness).
Personally, immediately I identify this, I often try as much as possible to engage in unrelated social activities, engage in discussions with friends, watch funny/ comedy movies until I feel emotionally rejuvenated to get back to work.
Funny enough I might take a whole day engaging in the above activities just to make sure I destress completely because mental health is of essence To me.
Yes! I do what you do!
2 pointers here:
a). My body and mind give me a pre-warning that I am heading towards a level of bad stress that I will struggle to manage. Around this time, I start deescalating my stress levels - I do many things - listen to music, watch movies, watch hilarious comedy clips, spend more hours with family, go out to eat with the family - just to break my routine.
b). And if a). doesn't work and if I still pushed into bad stress levels. My son is my inspiration. He is a wheelchair user, 21 yrs, a psychology student in the university, and needs 24/7 care. My wife and I are amazed to note his confidence levels! He is a motivational speaker and calls himself : " I am a limited edition"! So I watch him and think to myself: "If my son can make it against all odds, why not I? And what else can stand in from of me?"
For me, stress is a mindset. If you allow the mind set develop in you, you need to find ways to come out of it too! How well and how fast you can come out of or shun the mindset, you will be benefited.
@Tony Nwankwo completely agree with your point on doing things to disengage when we feel stressed - usually, just taking a break and getting some distance from the problem or situation that's causing me stress works well. Or I try and do something physical to divert my mind - like taking a walk, exercising, even doing a load of dishes helps me find calm sometimes. :)
So many great comments here! I'm not the best at managing my own stress, but ever since the COVID pandemic began, I've been trying to improve. Getting up and going for a walk will often help alleviate my stress in the moment (e.g., a frustrating email or phone call). Playing calming music while I work can help me a lot. And ensuring that I make time to "unplug" from work, to just focus on reading to my son or digging into his building blocks with him -- otherwise it can be easy for me to forget that I am a human being first and a researcher second, which definitely increases my sense of stress!
@Erin Owens absolutely love this line - "otherwise it can be easy for me to forget that I am a human being first and a researcher second..." - I think it's incredibly important to acknowledge this. I don't think we even realize that we prioritize our work needs over our human needs SO often. Every time we lose sleep over work, keep going even though we're physically exhausted, sacrifice a meal or meal time, etc., is us forgetting that we're human beings first. I'm so glad that you brought this perspective into the discussion - thank you! 😊
@Andrea Hayward Thanks, Andrea 😊 Right now, skipping exercise / physical activity to work a little more is my WORST mistake. My body is telling me how unhappy it is! I am working on feeling ok about being a little less productive at work so that I can be productive in my own skin.
@Erin Owens what a coincidence! Over the past couple of months, I've been consciously shutting shop at a specific time so that I can get in as many hours of exercise as I'd planned for that particular week. I realized that earlier I was letting the work drag on much later and then was either too tired to exercise or I was only doing as much as the remaining time "allowed me to," or worse - I was exercising with an exhausted body and feeling worse later. During this time, I was trying to cram in as much exercising as I could over the weekend and it was making me progressively more unhappy, instead of making me feel good and energized. The balance that I have now is helping me give my best at work and also focus on myself and do the things I enjoy without having to feel like I'm on some deadline.
I broke down last month. Taking a rest and improving your sleep hygiene is good.
@Adaora Anyichie - Odis - Sorry to hear that you broke down last month. How are you now? And what did you do to bounce back?
Thank you Jayashree, I took bedrest and plenty sleep. Fruits is also good.
@Adaora Anyichie - Odis sorry you hear that you had a difficult time last month. But at the same time, I'm very glad that you took the time you needed to rest and recuperate. Before I moved into a Work From Home setting, I'd barely get 6 hours of sleep and my day was so hectic and busy that it almost felt like I was "living tired." Now that I spend most of my time at home, falling into a regular sleep pattern has been easier to manage and it's been very rejuvenating. So, I can fully relate with what you're saying about getting plenty of sleep.
Glad you're feeling better! Sending virtual hugs to keep the good feeling going 🤗
a virtual big hug 🤗from me for you, @Adaora Anyichie - Odis. I am also happy to know that you can manage your tone back. By the way, I love fruits too. When I am under pressure and stressful and hectic, I lose my apatite. Fruit juices or fruit smoothie always help me on recharging my energy.
I hope you will be finer and healthier afterward.